Ralph Congratulates Southampton’s Entire Goal Threat

I usually refer to what ever the League Cup is called these
days as the Reserve Team Trophy. The FA Cup, has been going the same way
especially when you are a Premier League side, drawn against a lower division
side.  It also happens for teams who are
in with a shout of getting promoted, especially those with a chance of getting
promoted to the promised land of the Premier League. So, with one team in the
relegation zone in the Premier League and another in the play-off zone in the Championship,
I can only assume we will not be seeing many first-team regulars on the pitch
today at Pride Park for Derby versus Southampton. Maybe this is the reason why
this is one of the very few games that has not been moved from the Saturday 3
pm slot but that’s another discussion.

I didn’t expect there to be any way that Ralph Hasenhüttl would not rotate the
squad and sure enough, it came to pass with the only Redmond, Vestergaard,
Cedric and JWP being in the side who are likely to play in the next league
game. Callum Slattery was awarded his first full start alongside JWP with Matt
Targett and Jack Stephens in the back four. On the wings we had Nathan Redmond
and Mo Elyounoussi was given another chance and upfront we had the dream team,
the double talisman, the deadly duo, the dynamic duo, yep you guessed it, Long
and Austin with a chance to prove their credentials in preparation for their
transfers to Championship clubs either in January or next summer. Captain for
the day was JWP.

Usually, when there are two scratch teams who are not familiar with each other
at all, the first 15 minutes is really dull and nothing happens but something
did happen and it was something very surprising in that we took the lead.
Cedric lobbed a throw-in down the line, Long flicked infield and suddenly Redmond
seem to have half of the pitch to himself and he accelerated into it before
firing across the goalkeeper and no matter what the commentators say, it was
going in anyway before Keogh made sure and everyone said it was an own goal.

Everyone was interested in how Callum Slattery was going to fare in midfield
but the first time he was really noticed was when he lost the ball in their
half sparking a Derby break with Marriott combining with Holmes who kind of ran
out of angle before shooting straight at Gunn at the new post. Derby didn’t
have many attacks but they looked dangerous when they had them and found some
joy against our somewhat lightweight central midfield with Holmes again having
a decent chance on the edge of the box but curling it wide. We don’t really
look like scoring a second goal as our strikers didn’t really look like they
even knew what sport they were playing. 
Trampoline touches or the inability to play a basic 5 yard ball were the
order of the day.

We had taken the lead five minutes into the first half and lo and behold, five
minutes of the second-half, Austin made his first positive contribution of the
game by laying the ball off to Redmond but this is really all Redmond’s work as
he advanced and then curled an unstoppable shot over the top of the keeper and
into the far top corner.  Great goal and
how well is this lad playing now?

This game was comfortable now and then followed 10 minutes
of almost total Saints possession and Derby appear to give up but as you know
from watching Saints this season, it only takes one little thing and it all
goes to shit. One ball through to Lawrence who is been played onside by Cedric
he very inventively chips the ball up and Marriott it’s a really good
controlled volley giving Gunn no chance at all. Jack Stephens bravery must be
noted here as he turned his back in case the ball hit him.

Peak Southampton is reached five minutes later as Vestergaard under no
pressure, passes it straight out of play. Derby take the throw, move the ball
from their right to left, Lawrence picks it up in midfield and absolutely no
one closes down as he saunters to the edge of the box before firing it across Gunn
and into the corner to make it to 2-2. For fuck’s sake. Another feature of this
goal was Jack Stephens once again looking at our goalkeeper with his back
turned to the striker who was having a shot. 
Cedric didn’t close down the player with the ball and our right winger
who should have been tracking back, Elyounoussi… wasn’t even in our own half.

Having woken up to the fact that we are going to get knocked out if it carries
on like this, Saints find a bit of life. Shane Long gets free on the right but
pisses around until he loses it gets lucky as it breaks to Austin, who to be
fair pulls out an excellent cross and picks out Elyounoussi – 6 yards out,
unmarked, with just a goalkeeper to beat and the ball at a perfect height so
what does he do? – cushion the header straight at the goalkeeper. Honestly,
it’s one of the worst headers I have ever seen from that position. Absolutely
pathetic.

Ralph has seen enough with Elyounoussi straight off to be replaced by Marcus
Barnes for his debut and Tyreke Johnson is on for Charlie Austin who clearly
has it written in his contract somewhere but he can’t play 90 minutes against
anybody. There is time for us to try and lose it as ex-Skate and all round
knobhead David Nugent sets up Marriott with more or less an open goal on the
edge of the box but luckily he smashes it over the bar And his lack of
composure is the only reason why we are still in the FA Cup this year.

First things first, we didn’t get knocked out. It was a bit of a return to
the bad old days where we were comfortably leading and managed to switch off
the 10 minutes and totally fucked it up. We really should be in the fourth
round proper and everyone would say it was a job well done but as it is, we
have to play again at St.Marys in the next couple weeks which at least takes
one more game out of the Pierre Hojbjerg suspension.

When you going to talk about who did well today then you really have to start
with Nathan Redmond who was superb throughout and is turning very quickly into
the kind of player that he always had the potential to be. Callum Slattery did
okay for a first game considering how lightweight the midfield was and I am
sure he will get another chance when hopefully he will have a bit more muscle
around him to give him more of a chance to express himself. The defence had
very very little to do until the mad 10 minutes when they looked absolutely
shocking. Cedric and Stephens at right back and right centre back has always
been a disaster, the famous Cedric/Stephens corridor of uncertainty and so it
proved again today.  Mind you, Stephens
can’t see it because he’s got his back turned. 
Vestergaard always looks shaky in a back four and Targett just always
look shaky whenever he has to do any defending.  

The three players who really needed to need to step up today
and prove something to Ralph, were Elyounoussi, Long and Austin and all three
of them were absolutely shit. Austin gave one of his best hangover
performances, barely raising a jog and hardly having a touch again.  Elyounoussi is a player with absolutely zero
confidence and he capped it off with that header. When you have a free header from
five yards, cushioning it straight to the goalkeeper is really not what you
should be doing for fucks sake.  The
trouble is that Moi has never shown anything so there’s nothing for fans to
fall back on.  By that I mean that with
Boufal, you could at least see there was skill there and he did the odd decent
thing so people cut him a bit of slack. 
When Redmond was struggling you could see the pace and potential.  Moi doesn’t seem to be particularly blessed
in any department at the moment – pace, skill, vision etc.  We need to see something.

Shane produced his full repertoire of not reading the game,
blind alley reactive running, Jack Russell impersonation chasing the ball and
trampoline touches. The fucking worrying thing is that Danny Ings is injured, Michael
Obafemi is injured, Sam Gallagher is injured, Manolo Gabbiadini is being sold
probably to Sampdoria and Charlie Austin is probably going to get banned for
his two fingered farewell and fuck off effort against Manchester City and Shane
Long is therefore the only fit striker that we have for the forthcoming league
games. Marcus Barnes didn’t really stick his hand up today but he is going to
be there or thereabouts unless someone miraculously gets fit or we sign another
striker.

So we now have a replay to look forward to and the prize for winning that, is a
4^th Round trip to Accrington Stanley which is one to get the away
travellers buzzing as apparently we haven’t played there since 1959. That of
course is a very winnable game should we get there which should focus the mind
is a little bit more on the Derby replay.

Next we go to Leicester in the league and despite beating both Chelsea and Manchester
City recently, Claude Puel is back under pressure because he has managed to
lose at home to Cardiff and now away at Newport in the FA Cup. As a mid-table
side with absolutely nothing to play for, you would think that he would
prioritise the FA Cup and put out a strong team but not a bit of it.  It really isn’t going to take too much for
the fans to turn on him there so an early goal should do nicely as long as we
don’t fuck it up again like we did today.