What Happened Next?

Derby at home in the FA Reserve Team Trophy 3rd Round replay
which we have to play because we couldn’t hold onto a 2-0 lead when we went up
to Derby last week.

I have to admit that I was thinking about giving this game a miss but then my
sons football team decided to go en masse so here I am again. We get there and
it occurs to that even at 50 years old, once I got in the ground and see all
the lights on the pitch and all that, I actually felt guilty for even
contemplating not coming to the game. There is a decent enough crowd in with
only the Chapel Stand being closed. Since I’d had my will I/won’t I moment
about coming to the game, it had been selected for live screening on BBC 1 so I
have to admit I was surprised by the amount of people that were present.

But what players will be present? Well, there were a few from the Leicester
game with Vestergaard and Stephens at the back, Romeu and JWP in the middle and
Stuart Armstrong and Shane Long upfront. These were augmented by Kayne Ramsay,
Tyreke Johnson, Cedric, Muhammad Elyounoussi and Angus Gunn. Derby had a few
more first teamers as this time around with Harry Wilson and Mason Mount, on
loan from Liverpool and Chelsea respectively, in the starting line-up. I still
think that it is fucking ridiculous that loan players can play in the FA Cup
but that’s a whole other argument for another day. Derby are of course managed
by Frank Lampard and have it seems, officially change their name to Frank
Lampard’s Derby County because it seems to be in the contract that you can’t mention
Derby without mentioning the managers name.

I’m expecting a back four but we appear to have lined up with five at the back
and Johnson at left wing-back which is going to be interesting because he plays
as an attacking winger for the Under 23s.

We start the better of the two sides and should take the
lead on 10 minutes and JWP whips a corner from the right hand side which was
met by the master header of the ball, Jack Stephens… and so ended up in the
Northam.

If Jack’s heading ability is a recurring theme then so is Shane Long and his
finishing as Stephens and JWP combine to put Tyreke Johnson away on the left
and he puts over an absolutely perfect cross which Long meets 5 yards out and
manages to hit the goalkeeper. The rebound goes straight to Armstrong who
manages to play tunnel ball with it as it disappears through his legs and Derby
clear it again.

Derby are looking very comfortable and are playing some decent football and
create a superb opening on the half hour which is gifted to them by Ramsey just
passing the ball aimlessly out of defence and giving it away 20 yards out. The
ball is fed into Waghorn it takes a touch and plays Bryson in and he slots it
past Gunn with a really good finish and opening goal for Derby. There are no complaints
from any of our players and no complaints from our supporters. Time goes by,
civilisations rise and fall, continents drift, ice caps melt in and then the
goal gets disallowed by VAR. on the one hand, it’s very funny but on the other
hand it’s fucking ridiculous.

Half-time and it’s fucking cold.

It is no surprise that Johnson is hooked off at half-time having been booked in
the first half and with the Valery incident from last week fresh in the mind.
On comes Nathan Redmond with Cedric going to left back in a flat back four.

Long distant shooting seems to be the order of the day at the start of the
second-half with Wilson hitting one that Gunn saved relatively comfortably and
then Redmond coming in from the left and hammering one near post which brought
a decent reaction save from Roos. In the 10 minutes he has been on the pitch
you can see that Nathan Redmond is operating at a completely higher level than
all of our other attacking players.

The game needs a goal and much to my surprise, it’s us that goes in front as
Ramsey wins ball down the right hand side as a Derby player collapsed looking
for a free-kick. Long finds Elyounoussi he chips of a perfect across for Long
at the back post.  Shane does what he
always does and finds a way to miss as his point-blank header is cleared off
the line but it pops up for Armstrong and the man with the perfect hair nods
into the net.

There’s not much from Derby in the way of a response and we go further ahead
five minutes later as Stephens breaks up the play in defence and surges through
the midfield before slotting the ball through to Redmond. One-on-one with the
keeper and there’s only one winner there as he’s chips it over the onrushing
Roos to make it 2-0. The difference between a confident Nathan Redmond and last
year’s version is huge. There is no way he would’ve scored that last year.

Shane Long has been struggling since picking up a knock at the end of the first
half and he is replaced with Sam Gallagher for what should be a fairly simple
canter into the next round. Yeah right.

Most of the Derby threat is coming down our right hand side with Cedric playing
out of position at left back and Elyounoussi not doing any tracking back at all
in the left wing position. Derby full-back Bogle picks up the ball and runs at
Cedric and it looks like our man can’t be bothered to tackle him so he kind of
body checks in with his arse as he runs past to give away a free-kick just
outside the box on the corner of the penalty area. No I don’t profess to follow
the Championship but I know that Harry Wilson is left footed and has spanked in
about 10 goals from outside the box including a few spectacular free kicks. I
know that he’s going to shoot but it doesn’t seem that anyone else, including
Angus Gunn thinks he’s going to hit it from there. The two man wall is woefully
inadequate as Wilson smashes it across and it nestles in the far corner.

10 minutes to go and can we fuck it up? Of course we can as Wilson is allowed
to cross from the right hand side and it’s a goal we’ve conceded so many times
before with the ball sailing over Jack Stephens and our right-sided defender
not covering round. The forward with the free header is Waghorn and the
defendant not covering round is Ramsay.

We do have a great chance to win it on 90 minutes as Redmond plays a quick 1-2
with Armstrong and cuts in from the left hand side. He should shoot but instead
he knocks it across the goal and Elyounoussi can’t get there at the back post.

90 minutes are up, extra time is looming and it’s still fucking cold.

The first half of extra time sees Callum Slattery on for Armstrong and there’s
nothing much to report other than Gallagher getting brought down and JWP
sending a free-kick comfortably over the bar.

15 to go, still fucking cold. Mercifully, we don’t have another half time
relay.

If Saints were the better team in the first half of extra time, then Derby are
the better team in the second with Lawrence heading a very presentable chance
well over the bar and then us nearly falling for a long throw routine as
Vestergaard gets beaten in the air, the ball goes over Stephens yet again and
Ramsey is not marking his plate yet again and Lawrence yet again heading over
the bar.

Having survived those scares, Ramsey collapses with cramp and is replaced with Targett
and in the last few minutes we had two glorious chances to win it as firstly
Romeu charges through from midfield, gives it to Redmond whose touch is
unfortunately heavy and Roos comes running out to block it. In the last second,
Slattery who is kind of playing as a right winger perfectly picks out
Elyounoussi with a cross but instead of smashing into the net like any
relatively competent player would’ve done, our man pulls out the air shot and
falls on his arse.

Fuck, penalties it is and it’s still fucking cold.

Here we go, Derby first.

Waghorn smashes it high down the middle

JWP scores comfortably like at Leicester

Ex-Skate fucking knobhead David Nugent comfortably sends Gunn the wrong way and
milks it like the fucking hasbeen that he is.

Redmond. I know he scored one in the last shootout and he’s playing with
confidence but he has always been a shaky penalty taker and… Fucking hell
that’s crap… wide and high and shit

Mason Mount, in off the bar whilst Gunn collapses in a corner. It would be nice
if you actually went the right fucking way, even once.

Up steps to 6 foot 7 penalty taker. It will never not look odd but Vestergaard
buries it easily enough.

Lawrence…. Gunn goes the wrong way yet again.

Targett…. last seen are missing a penalty in the Everton shootout. This
time…. has to score… Straight down the middle but got away with it.

Keogh. Derby captain. Looks about 45 years old… Sends Gunn the wrong way again.

Bollocks, we lost, and it still fucking cold.

As the last penalty hit the net as we knew it would, the FA
Cup adventure was over for another season. It’s a shame in a way as it always
is to go out of any competition but I think in this case we have to look at the
bigger picture. By making an almighty bollocks of the start of the season we
almost gave up our right to have an FA Cup run because the league is more
important obviously. If we were sitting happily in mid-table then you really
should have a go at the FA Cup but being down near the bottom makes it a
different scenario.

It was a strange game with the two teams taking turns to really lack energy and
intensity. Of course when it goes to penalties, anyone can win but there does
appear to be something fundamentally wrong with Angus Gunn and his penalty
saving technique. He is now faced 11 successive penalties in the shootout
defeats to Leicester and Derby and in truth, he hasn’t even got close to saving
even one. I think you would expect a training mannequin tied to the crossbar to
save more than that. Still, it’s not his fault that Nathan Redmond smashed his
penalty into the crowd which was a shame because he was by far and away our
best player.

It was an interesting debut for Tyreke Johnson who I don’t think has ever
played left wingback in his life and I am sure that he would have stayed on if
it wasn’t for the booking and his tendency to slide into tackles. He put over a
couple of great crosses to be fair and was overall, quite promising. The same
can be said for Kayne Ramsey who overall played pretty well but he did get
caught ball watching on both the Derby disallowed goal and the equaliser. On
the equaliser, he really looks like he been taking right-back tips from Cedric
as the ball came over, sailed over Jack Stephens head and Ramsey’s man scored.
Cedric had a strange match, at some point looking energetic, at other points
looking like he couldn’t be bothered like on the tackle that led to the first
goal when he brought the guy down because of throwing his hip at him as he ran
past. Very strange.

In midfield, Romeu and JWP were pretty good throughout but we had problems
further forward where, aside from floating up a really good cross for the first
goal, Elyounoussi again failed to provide any evidence as to why we bought him.
He doesn’t appear to be quick, he doesn’t appear to have a trick to get past people
and he doesn’t appear to have much composure. I noticed another worrying thing
in that when he made any sort of run he appeared to be blowing and struggling
to get back. The Derby come back all came down our left hand side in the second
half where Moi wasn’t tracking back and Cedric was obviously battling with
playing on the wrong side.

Upfront, it was good to see Armstrong get on the scoresheet again and Shane
Long did some decent work before he got injured but have a pair of them
combined to not put us in front from one of Johnson’s brilliant crosses I will
never know..

Fair play to Derby and fat Frank and through to the next round to play
Accrington and good luck to them. We have bigger fish to fry in the shape of
Everton coming to town on Saturday where we will have Hojbjerg and Valery
returning to the team. That will be an interesting one because neither Romeu or
JWP deserve to be left out. With Long being injured, the good news is that
Danny Ings will be involved and with Austin also available, to take up a place
on the bench no doubt. That position is covered with the somewhat rusty looking
Sam Gallagher also in the mix. Whisper It quietly but Ryan Bertrand might also
be fit.

So whilst it would’ve been nice to win today, I don’t feel that it is the end
of the world that we lost. I could’ve done without freezing my bollocks off for
120 minutes plus penalties before we lost but such is life.  Did I mention that it was fucking cold?

Bring on the Premier League again and let Ralph work his magic with a full
squad. You never know which Everton side it’s going to turn up so it’s a good
chance to get another three points on the board.