£30 million? Really?

During our forays into Europe in the mid-2010s, we came in at round three and , during the non-European years we came in at round two and now of course, here we are, relegated and in round one and Northampton Town away from home. There are still some idiots around, who think this is a local derby.

We last played against Northampton in 2009 when by a quirk of fate, we drew them in both domestic competitions, winning 2-0 at St Mary’s in the League up and winning 3-2 at Sixfields in the FA Cup. The League cup game was notable for the debut of a certain Sir Rickie Lambert, who started his Saints career as he went on, with a goal on his debut after about 15 minutes. What a legend that man is. Other goals that year against Northampton were scored by Adam Lallana (2), Dean Hammond and the Senagalese God of Offside – Papa Waigo.

Since then, Northampton have yo-yoed between League One and League Two. They completed two successive seasons in League One last season and will probably be looking for a playoff place to make it into the second tier for the first time in their history. We of course hope that in the event of that happening, we are not there to play them in the league.

The only Saints connection I can in the squad is Sam Hoskins who came through our Academy and turned professional with us but moved on in 2013 to Yeovil for a couple of seasons before joining Northampton in 2015 and he is a bit of a legend with 400 appearances and nearly 100 goals for the Cobblers.

The last time we were in the first round of this competition, we rocked up to Gillingham and didn’t give a shiny shit and got deservedly dumped out of the competition. In that game, we played a lot of fringe players, most of whom couldn’t give a shit. This time, however, Will Still has promised that it will be slightly different. In reality, I think there will be a number of players who come into contention for this game, simply because of the large squad, so you may see the likes of Nathan Wood, Kuryu Matsuki and the likes of Damion Downs and Ross Stewart given minutes as we do need to sort our our combination of forwards. Still has emphasised the need to get us used to playing midweek games, as is the norm in the Championship of course, but I do expect this to be somewhat of a mix and match side because the bottom line is, this competition is really not our priority this year.

West Ham are today’s Everton with a piss-take bid for one of our players – name Matty Fernandes of course. I refer you to the transfer matrix published in the Wrexham write-up:

https://league1minus10.co.uk/2025/08/11/championship-match-1-southampton-2-wrexham-1/

We are currently at step 3.

1. Prem club (West Ham) derisory bid
2. Entitled fans from Prem club (West Ham) giving it the “they should accept what we want to pay” bullshit
3. Bid rejected

Step 4, which is client media pile on has started happening, alters slightly when it’s West Ham, with “former Saints player being linked in swap deal”. Danny Ings has left West Ham, so it’s now JWP, despite just being made West Ham vice captain.

Team news and I was right. 8 changes overall but Fernandes, Manning and THB were three of them so it wasn’t weakening much. Archer, Downs, Wood and McCarthy also started as did BBD. Ross Stewart was supposed to start but found a new way to miss a game, feeling dodgy in the warm-up. What’s next? Being kidnapped by aliens or something.

Despite the eight changes we start the game reasonably well and work it down the left-hand side with Manning’s cross being cleared as far as Ronnie Edwards about 25 yards out and he takes a touch before attempting to find the far top corner and the keeper very calmly watches it go just wide. If it had been inside the post he wouldn’t have had a prayer.

Some sloppy shit in midfield by Downs allows McGeehan to pick the ball up and advance unopposed to the edge of the box before drilling a decent low shot which McCarthy shovels around the post easily enough.

After an opening ten where we looked ok, we then looked decidedly disjointed again as we once again give ball away in midfield which means that Ronnie Edwards has to take one for the team on the edge of the box and picks up a booking. In comes the shot from the free-kick and Edwards makes up for the foul by blocking it and then Nathan Wood chucks himself in the way of the rebound which bobbles harmlessly through to McCarthy.

The ref awards Northampton a free kick by the corner flag as Nathan Wood commits the cardinal sin of standing his ground as a player runs into him. There looks to be no danger as the cross comes in and McCarthy rises confidently and drops the fucking thing, which results in carnage and a shot poked towards goal which THB hacks off the line.

This is awful now. Is the pitch too dry?, is it too bobbly? or shall we get out of Jurgen Klopp excuses territory and look at ourselves? None of our forwards can hold the ball up and consequently none of the midfield or full-backs can get forward. It’s shite. Just before halftime, we actually create something with Archer sending BBD away down the left. He could shoot but instead, shows an appreciation of other players that he rarely shows and plays a perfect ball into the path of Damion Downs who from 3 yards… tackles himself and the ball goes fucking nowhere whilst he tries to untangle his legs. Jack Stephens is not there to bail him out this time.

Half time and a half that will not live long in the memory.

Out of nowhere at the start of the second half, some football breaks out, with Downs laying the ball off to Fernandes and onto BBD. BBD decides to act something like a footballer for the second time today and gives the ball to Archer gets to the edge of the box and he waits for Fernandes’ overlapping run and plays him in. Matty should shoot and if he was only worth £30 million then he would shoot, but he’s worth a lot more than that, so a quick check back, allowing the defender to go sliding past into the advertising hoardings and Matty smashes it into the roof of the net. A brilliant goal in a game that has not deserved it.

For a few minutes it looks like we might bury them as we win the ball back and go straight up the Northampton end and win a corner. In it comes from Fernandes, headed out to the edge of the box and Sugawara smashes in a volley which rockets through the crowd of players and smashes into the post with the goalkeeper not moving anywhere.

Then it all dies down again and we stop playing and another Northampton long ball skews off one of our defenders and they win a corner, which is delivered into the mixer and met about 6 yards out by the towering Forbes who manages to head straight down and bouncing over the top of the bar. It’s a very clear chance and ultimately, almost as bad a miss as our one int he first half.

We should have another chance later on as Flynn Downs wins possession high up with a perfectly executed tackle on Northampton sub Taylor, and we are three on two but the referee, is the only person in the ground who thinks that’s a foul and gives Northampton a free kick. Flynn is very impressed and it’s expletive city and slamming the ball into the ground for a yellow card for his entirely justified reaction.

Damion Up

As the game fades to black, there’s some more limited shit from Northampton to deal with, with the ball being pumped long, but that’s about it and we avoid a penalty shoot-out which we no doubt would have lost.

Well, that was a dreadful game to watch. It was like one of our pre-season games with awful disjointed shit going on all over the pitch. Maybe the pitch itself was a factor or maybe we were loargely not very good. We certainly hardly played any decent football, with our forwards totally incapable of getting hold of the ball and bringing others into play

There was one bit of quality all game and it was no surprising that in a week when the derisory bids have started coming in, it was Matty Fernandes who provided it, brilliantly taking Cameron Archer’s pass, selling a hotdog to Shaun Dyche’s son, before drilling it into the roof of the net. Shaun will no doubt tell his boy that going for a hotdog is utter woke nonsense.

We did have another couple of chances – one before we scored in one after. Sugawara’s effort against the post was a great hit from the edge of the box that deserved a goal and then there was the other mess. On Saturday, our new striker Damion Downs got away with an air shot from 3 yards because Jack Stephens stuck it in at the back post. Todays near identical effort was a case of Damion Falling Downs. It is slightly worrying that he’s missed two absolute glaring sitters in the space of four days and they both looked to have been similar in way he’s not been able to sort his feet out and as consequently looked very uncoordinated. Against that though, the goal he swept in against Espanyol showed great balance and control. Will the real Damion Downs please stand up… and not fall down.

Another of the talking points about this game was once again the referee, who had an incident with Flynn Downes at the end of the game that was just laughable. Flynn turned up possession with a perfectly clean tackle about 25 yards out from their goal and we were three on two as a result, but he blew for an imagined foul. I’m not an expert lip reader, but I’m guessing Flynn‘s yellow card report will read something like “Southampton’s number four, in his best Danny Dyer accent, posed the question “what the fucking hell have you given that for?””.

Of the players you didn’t start against Wrexham, you can imagine that THB did enough to come into the defence if we stick back three, Ryan Manning was solid on the left but Matty Fernandes of course gives the manager a bit of a problem if he wants to stick to this formation. The main downside was the forwards – Downs did some decent stuff with his back to goal but… we all know the but. Brereton Diaz played the ball across for that sitter but other than that he just looks like a man with no football ability whatsoever. Cameron Archer flatters to deceive a little bit because he has got pace, but none of them really showed any reason why they should be starting games in the Championship. Ross Stewart probably became a better option at centre forward through not playing today.

Damion Falling Downs

Onwards and despite the game being shit, Will is still unbeaten. We turned up, we won the game, people got minutes and we’re through to the next round. Bring on Championship favourites Ipswich.

Up the fucking Saints.