A Picture Paints a Thousand Words

Stoke visit St Mary’s this afternoon, off the back of two wins out of two at the start of the Championship season. Having struggled last year and being on the fringes of the relegation battle, they certainly would have taken this, even though the slight caveat is that the two wins have been against teams who are expected to struggle in Derby and Sheffield Wednesday. Stoke won’t be getting carried away with themselves but it’s a great start and you can only beat what’s in front of you and winning two games is seriously better than any other alternative. In Mark Robins, they have a proven manager at this level and after a few years where they’ve been changing manager every six months, it would be no surprise if Robins proves to be a stable choice by comparison. One of their previous shit managers was Nathan Jones of course, so we have that in common as well as red and white stripes. Maybe today will be a competition to find which fanbase hates him the most. Nathan would refer to this game as the Nathan Jones Derby, from the comfort of a Welsh mining village. Prick.

“Statistically speaking, It’s the Nathan Jones Derby boyo, and no mistake”

Six goals in two games, regardless of the opposition, is not to be sniffed at and the forwards are where the strength of Stoke’s team lies, with Divin Mubama, Sorba Thomas and the fantastically named Million Manhoef being the leading lights. In goal they have Victor Johansson, a goalkeeper who was with Rotherham the last time we were in the Championship and in all honesty, we would have racked up about fifteen goals against them in the two games if it wasn’t for him.

So, today is not gonna be easy, but it’s a game that we should certainly be going out and winning, in our attempt to turn St Mary’s into a place where teams really don’t want to go and expect to come away with nothing, as opposed to last year when it was a place that teams love to come to and the only question was how many goals they would win by.

Talking of last season, one of the teams that we lost twice to has been in touch with West Ham coming back to somewhere near the negotiating table as they try and sign Mateus Fernandes in the week of them getting gubbed 3-0 by newly promoted Sunderland on the opening day of the Premier League season and last night getting smashed 5-1 by Chelsea at the London Dildodome. Their original bid of £28 million was laughed out of the room by Saints, with us saying that we wanted over £50 million.  Consequently, West Ham have gone away, thought about it and then offered £30 million. There are add-ons of course but knowing that David Sullivan is involved, I assume it’s a bag of dildos and strip club memberships or whatever. Get serious or fuck off.

Saints have been linked this week, to a couple of players by the transfer gurus from around the Internet, but it turned out (so far anyway) taht there was a lot of click bait and hot air. Ultimately, Fabrizio Romano reporting that Saints have opened talks with someone, means absolutely fuck all because as we know, there are approximately a million ways that a deal doesn’t happen from that point. Morgan Guilavogui and Issa Kabore have been two of them more recent players we have allegedly opened talks with. Kabore in particular was an interesting one seeing as he is a right back and then out of absolutely fucking nowhere on Thursday, we announced the signing of Mads Roerslev from Brentford, a right back/right wing back who I remember absolutely tearing us a new arsehole in the 5-0 capitulation we had at home to Brentford last season.

Being good in that game was not necessarily a great barometer and in fact, being good against us in any game last season was not exactly difficult, but like our other incomings this season, Roerslev is another player who is extremely fit and can run all day. He played a massive part in Brentford’s promotion to the Premier League and has nearly 100 appearances in the top division over the last few seasons. To find a player with that amount of Premier League experience, who is willing to play in the Championship and that we can afford, is on the face of it a fine piece of work.

Upon the transfer being announced, the reaction from Brentford fans was mixed to say the least with the more reasonable ones commenting on the fact that you always gives 100% and his fitness and work ethic were exceptional, and the more negative entitled Brentford fans who can’t remember back three or four years when they were permanent members of the EFL in various divisions, saying that he is shit and they are glad that he was moved on blah blah blah. For those fans, let’s see where Roerslev and Brentford are playing their football in 12 months time because it’s very possible, if this season goes how we want to go, that the player you think is shit will be playing in a higher division than your club.  Much has been made of the fact that Fabrizio Romano etc did not have a sniff of this before it was announced, which is a sure sign that clubs are throwing false transfer stories into the mix to try and throw people like him off the scent. Long may that continue as these incremental transfer updates that we get these days are a massive pain in the arse.

So Thursday brought Roerslev and Friday brought a departure with Everton and Saints finally striking a deal for Tyler Dibling to move to the Hill Dick Stadium for £42 million and 20% of any future profit on the transfer fee.  From Everton‘s point of view it’s amusing that being absolutely shit in your first game means that you find a few more quid down the back of the sofa, though that didn’t happen with West Ham and their pursuit of Fernandes. It’s a shame in a way because a season in the Championship would’ve been really good for Tyler‘s long-term football career, but of course, long-term is not in anyone’s thinking when there is agents agitating for a move and a player who is not going to sign a contract extension in two years time.

Tyler Practicing Holding All That Money

In fact, long-term thinking and logical doesn’t even factor into the thinking of many of our own fans who basically saw Tyler be brilliant at the start of last season and then tail off towards the end of the season. That was always gonna happen because the team was shit and he was only 18 and playing in his first year of men’s football . He suffered a bit through overachieving and once you set the bar at a certain level, many fans these days seem very unforgiving if you drop below it and they are certainly unforgiving if you are not an all-action player who looks like he’s about to die for the badge every time he steps on the pitch. It pissed me off last season when some acted like Tyler was one of the main reasons we were getting relegated. If you thought that then you genuinely weren’t looking in the right places because before the season started, Tyler had not even factored into anyone’s thinking about what our team on the pitch was going to be.  Hopefully people will be a little bit more understanding when Jay Robinson has an inevitable dip in form as this season goes on, but somehow I doubt it.

A big money move to Everton could work out either way. Of course, it’s not one of the really big guns of the Premier League which of course will mean more playing time and more pressure to perform. Tyler should be seen as a long term investment but football doesn’t seem to work like that and the expectations will be huge. If you cast your mind back to our other stellar academy graduates, Gareth Bale and Theo Walcott for example went to huge clubs and disappeared for a year or so before turning into the players they eventually became. Tyler won’t get that opportunity and the expectation will be that he performs now and consistently. Good luck to him in fulfilling his potential.

Anyway, In this PSR world that we live in, we were always gonna take the deal this summer.  It was either £42 million now or £15 to £20 million this time next year… or nothing the year after that because agents and young players are very much against signing a new contract at an existing club. It’s just the way the footballing landscape is these days. It sucks and it will change in the future, but that’s the way it is right now whenever the term ‘pure profit’ is mentioned and a player moving clubs will always generate more income for an agent.

Slightly less worthy of comment is the fact that we have finally got ABK’s ass out the door again.  We’ve been trying to get him out the door for awhile but he kept getting stuck because the door wasn’t wide enough. Mr Professional Good Attitude has found a home at Nantes in France and leaves with an option to buy for the French club, which they of course won’t take because they will see him play. Not our problem of course because we will take the loan fee and assuming they won’t want to keep him, his contract runs out in the summer of 2026. What an absolute waste of fucking time and money that guy has been.  The heroes welcome he got when he finally set foot on the pitch last season is one of the strangest moments I’ve ever witnessed as a Saints fan. The phrase “he’s a full German interntional” has never carried less weight than it does with this guy. An absolute blagger but a blagger who I will have a morbid curiosity about following his career from this point onwards.

Anyway, isn’t it nice to be looking forward to a game at St Mary’s again…? Team news and Nathan Wood is in for Josh Q but that’s about it. No change up front but at at least Damion Downs and Ross Stewart are back to make the bench look stronger, a bench that also incudes Mads Roerslev.

Saints threatened first with Welington getting down the left in acres of space and his cross to the near post picks out Shea Charles, who heads it on target but it hits Jay Robinson and goes wide for a goal kick. Unfortunately for Welington, his next contribution is to dive into a tackle on Manhoef and collapse in a heap on the ground, eventually having to go off to be replaced by Ryan Manning.

Manhoef is causing us problems down the Stoke right and is cross in to the middle is cleared as far as Downes and Mubama trashes through him in really untidy fashion and picks up a yellow card. I reckon that would be a red in the Premier League. As the first half goes on, most of Saints attacks flounder when it comes to getting the ball to the forwards. Arma is barely getting involved at all and J-Rob is getting ont he ball and turning but more often than not, is being knocked off the ball and not getting anything from the referee. Flynn Downes bursts forwards down the right and his ball across is perfect for Robinson and he passes it first time onto the foot of the post and it rebounds back to him via the keeper and a defender and he smacks it onto the same post again. Ridiculously unlucky because it could easily hit the goalkeeper on the back and rebound it into the net but no joy. An even first half ends with the dangerous Manhoef cutting infield and drilling it wide of of the far post.

Half-time and it’s been frustrating and Will Still clearly agrees and Adam Armstrong pays for our lack of attacking and is replaced with Damion Downs. Saints start the second half of the little bit more urgency, winner corner which is headed over the bar by THB. Another corner and THB meets it again and Johansson pulls off a brilliant save diving to his right. Some goalkeepers haunt you down the years and this fucker is one of those.

Sorba Thomas is a player I was worried about before the game starts and he wins a corner and then finds himself lurking on the edge of the box, watching Nathan Wood’s headed clearance drop down and his first time is brilliantly hit and flies narrowly over the bar.

The ghost of Russell Martin then makes an unwelcome appearance as THB plays a ball into Flynn Downes who has three players in close proximity and he makes a shit decision to try and let it run and of course he loses the ball about 25 yards out. Jun-ho find Thomas and his low cross finds Manhoef whose effort is blocked by the sliding Wood and Baz, but the rebound comes out to Lewis Baker, who runs it into the empty net. For fucks sake.

Stoke instantly start with the timewasting, taking a full two minutes celebrating their goal. This seems to fuel our frustration and we overcommit and a cross into the box punch clear by Johansson out to Manhoef on the right wing and he and he breaks and slides a lovely ball through to Mubama who is clean through against Baz and he takes a touch around him and collapses on the ground. On first viewing that looks like a dive and the referee clearly decides that it is a dive and a second yellow comes out. There seems to be a period when the referee has forgotten that he’s already booked him but the red card eventually happens and Mubama takes about two minutes to get up and get off the pitch.

50p Head with the Miss of the Season So Far

Ten minutes go by with nothing happening before we abandon the three at the back and Wood is off, with Ross Stewart joining Downs up front. Saints are back onto the attack while Stoke readjust and Fraser puts over a brilliant cross in between the defence and the goalkeeper and incoming Flynn Downes meets it and it’s the full 50p head and that’s heading towards the corner flag rather than the goal. Fucks sake.

And fucks sake yet again as we work the ball out to Manning on the left and his cross is fired across brilliantly and Ross Stewart meets it with some part of his anatomy about six yards out and bundles it over the bar. It is only a minor consolation that the flag has gone up so it wouldn’t have counted anyway.

Twenty minutes to go and we are still pushing with Fraser putting a cross into the box and we have five men in the area and three on the edge as the cross goes straight to Johansson. The keeper bowls it out first time and we ridiculously, have a one on one situation with Thomas and Stephens on the halfway line. Thomas carries it into the area with Jack shepherding the Welshman onto his stronger left foot and he drills across Baz into the net. Shit. Another two minute goal celebration.

Nothing to lose now with Charles and Robinson going off to get Archer and Roerslev on to the pitch. We win a corner on the right and Fernandes put it in and there is THB, rising to thump a header past Johansson to make it 2-1 with 10 minutes of normal time to go.

Too Little Too Late

It’s in our interests of course to speed things up but the gamesmanship is coming in thick and fast. Any time there’s any sort of challenge, the Stoke player ends up on the deck and it’s embarrassing but we’ve only got ourselves to blame for it. The keeper goes down for a minute and a half for nothing, then a defender and then the board goes up and it’s only five which is about half what it should be.

The only real chance we create in the last few minutes falls to the wrong player as Roerslev plays a ball into Flynn Downs and it ends up with Jack Stephens on the corner of the 6 yard box but he can only pop it into the hands of your hands of Johansson and it’s offside anyway.

Well, that was pretty dreadful. Slow, ponderous, lacking in movement and lacking in intensity all over the park. We got shown up by Stoke with their pace and athleticism and even with 10 men they were the better side in terms of providing a threat and actually converting, being first to everything all over the pitch. “Very efficient” was how Will Still described it.

Yes we can complain about the time wasting and the fact that the second half seem to be about five minutes short when you bear in mind how much time Stoke took to celebrate their goals, how much time it took Mubama get off the pitch after the red card and how much time Johansson spent on the ground pretending to be injured, but the fact of the matter is, they were in the position to be able to waste time because we were behind because we let in two particularly shit goals.

Looking at the two goals we conceded. THB played an absolutely fucking ridiculous pass into Flynn Downes feet when he had three players around him. Go straight to Hospital, Do Not Pass Go, Do Not Collect £200. A clear throwback to the Russell Martin days of absolute fucking suicide. Yes, Flynn could’ve done better with it but what’s the risk and reward on that pass? Do me a favour. The second goal is just an absolute joke. One nil down against ten men with 20 minutes to go and we’ve committed every player bar Jack Stephens and the goalkeeper into the penalty area as Ryan Fraser crosses that ball straight to the goalkeeper. A simple throw out to Sorba Thomas and he makes Jack Stephens look like a mug before drilling it across Baz into the net for what turned out to be the winning goal. As bad goals go that one is right up there with the one we conceded last year when we left Will Smallbone as the last defender on the half-way line. All four goals conceded this season have been shocking fro our point of view. We got away with it against Wrexham and Ipswich but two in one game kills you, especially when playing a decent origanized side.

My not particularly hot take of the day is that our main strikers were all shit. I don’t want to go in hard on Damion Downs after just three games but that level of performance and that style of performance is just not acceptable. If you’re not going to get involved and hold the ball up you have got to at least make it difficult for the defenders by producing clever movement away from them. He tried to make runs in behind, but the ball never got there so surely you try something different, like coming short for it. We needed him to come short and try and get hold of the ball but he just didn’t do that for the whole 45 minutes that he was on. Also, when the ball is crossed into the box, you can’t just fucking stand there and think you’ve done your job just by being in there. You need to make short sharp movements away from defenders to try and anticipate where the cross is going and get there first. Anyone can just fucking stand there and wait for the ball to drop. Which one of those four guys is gonna step up and bang in 20 goals this season? My money is on none of them. Jay Robinson is the only striker who looks remotely capable of doing anything and was very unlucky with his two shots in three seconds that smacked the base of the post. If one goes in there then we may well win the game but as soon as we went behind it was always going to be a struggle to turn it around against a very organized side, and so it proved.

In the first half, the issue was a lack of anything up front and a lack of options for people to pass to. Playing with a back three is for me, totally unnecessary in the Championship at home. It gives you one less player ahead of the ball and we just don’t appear to have enough options to pass the ball when you combine the lack of players with the lack of movement from the players who are out there. Even though Nathan Wood played quite well in the first half, taking Josh Q out of the team should’ve been the signal to pick an extra attacking player and go with the back four.  Having moaned about the attacking options though, our much vaunted midfield three were pretty shit to be honest. Fernandes had the occasional moment where he looks like a good player but both Charles and Downes were way off it, specialising in the under hit pass. Again the problem came from us being behind and having to play against a packed defence and the lack of creativity in the midfield being exposed.

Having said all that, we did create enough chances to win the game. Flynn Downes has to score that header and Ross Stewart has to score that open goal (even though it was flagged offside in the end).

Stoke, in the main, did a job on us with their organisation and the way they slowed the game down and wasted as much time as possible in the second half. Fair play to them. It was the perfect away performance by them especially with ten men and you can’t blame them for using the dark arts to see the game out. Sorba Thomas, Million Manhoef and Bae Jun-Ho were easily the best attacking players on the pitch, full of pace and purpose and intensity. Lewis Baker in midfield outplayed our two big names in there and deserved his goal from our first defensive shambles of the day.

Having got one back with ten minutes of normal time to go, we could’ve nicked a point out of it but we didn’t really deserve to and it would’ve papered over the cracks. There is much work to do to establish a regular back four, a midfield that can deliver the ball to the strikers and forward line that can regularly cause problems to the opposition defenders. Before today, I thought the main issue was the strikers but there are in fact issues all over the park that need to be addressed. Losing this game in isolation is not an issue but losing does throw more of a focus on the performances which have not been great. The odd ten minutes here or there against Wrexham and Ipswich, but that’s not enough and Will Still knows that.

He was very candid after the game, pointing out a few habits that were learned on the previous managers, namely Russell Martin for avoidance of any doubt, particularly when referencing the two goals we conceded. Personally, I think Will knows what’s wrong and now it’s up to him to fix it though it does worry me that he persists with Adam Armstrong at the middle and the three at the back, two things which we know don’t really suit this group of players but then, does anything really suit this group of players? There’s a school of thought that it doesn’t matter what formation you stick this group players of in as they are just not good enough as a group to put in decent performances. Time will tell and we haven’t got much time before the next game because it’s Norwich away in the Who Gives a Shit Cup on Tuesday but the main thing about next week is going to be the last week of the transfer window and I think Johannes Spors is going to be busy.

Up the fucking Saints