Time for a visit to the King Power to take on our old friends Leicester City, whom we defeated 3-0 at St Mary’s earlier in the season, during that glorious Tonda interim period. In all truth, it was probably the game that sealed the deal regarding getting the permanent job. At that time, Leicester were considered to be one of the favourites for an automatic spot and a return to the Premier League, but it hasn’t quite worked out that way, as they now find themselves one place above the relegation zone, largely due to the six-point deduction they finally received after about five years of financial fuckery.

Six points seems like a ridiculously light deduction, especially considering how long this issue has been ongoing. This was being talked about two years ago when we were in the Championship alongside them, and they were running away with it to eventually be crowned champions. I know these matters can rarely be resolved in time for a new season, but given the circumstances, it has always stuck in the throat a little that they were allowed to be promoted with this looming, allowing them to have a season in the Premier League with all the riches that come with it, including parachute payments and all that good stuff. Essentially, if the punishment remains at six points and they don’t get relegated this season, then they will, in effect, have completely gotten away with it. It hasn’t been fully explained yet why it was only six points because, by all accounts, Leicester didn’t cooperate with the investigation, so it should have been considered an aggravated breach. Rumour has it that the Premier League was pushing for a 20-point deduction. There are also whispers that when they took Joe Aribo on loan from us, the powers that be decided that Leicester had been punished enough. Leicester are still talking about appealing the deduction – I hope they do and it is deemed a frivolous appeal and more points are added.

Regardless of the points deduction, Leicester have been shite this year and there is a train of thought that they’ve actually got more points than they deserve from their performances. Certainly at St Mary’s, they didn’t look like a team that was particularly bothered and the only surprise to me was that Marti Cifuentes lasted as long as he did before eventually getting the bullet. There was no way that those players who played for Leicester at Saint Mary’s were playing for him.

However, they do have some good players still who have caused us problems before, most notably Abdul Fatawu and Stephy Mavididi, neither of whom did very much at St Mary’s but they are dangerous players nonetheless. The midfield is likely to feature the experienced Oliver Skipp and Harry Winks who might be experienced but they are very slow and that is certainly an area that we should be looking to exploit, which is what we did at St Mary’s. Whatever combination we have in midfield should be able to ram that advantage home.

One worry is our record at the King Power, which is pretty dreadful, bar a Premier League win here three years ago with two goals by Che Adams. We lost here comfortably in the Premier League last year and in the Championship last time around, we got absolutely buried five nil. We have been in the same division as Leicester of course as both clubs have bounced around between Premier League and Championship, either getting relegated together or getting promoted together for the last three seasons. I don’t think many people, especially in Leicester’s somewhat entitled fan base, thought there was any chance that we would finish above them this year, but a win today for the boys in red and white, would make that almost a certainty. Saints have upward momentum at the moment and Leicester are going to have to find the mentality for the relegation battle that they are now in. Leicester have over the last few years, not had that mentality when they needed it. In their initial relegation from the Premier League, they had a squad of players that should’ve finished in the top 10 but the combined efforts of Brendan Rogers and the players saw them drop into the Championship. Brendan walked away of course and I’m sure that deep behind his shiny teeth, he won’t be taking any blame for that one.

As for our manager, well, Tonda was making worrying noises after the Watford game about freshening up the team. This worries me. If he’s going to do anything, I do hope that it’s nothing to do with the back four, who have been the bedrock of our recent resurgence. To paraphrase Rasmus Ankersen, if it isn’t broke, then consider leaving it the fuck alone…. and he does, sort of – only one change but it’s significant, with Ross Stewart dropping to the bench in preference to Cameron Archer. I can only assume that Canadian Cyle is not fit enough to start.

Away we go and this is definitely a game where we need to hit them early and see how much they fancy it. Leicester fans don’t seem to fancy it much as there are many open spaces in their sections of the King Power. There’s an early mistake down their left and Azaz picks it up, gets his head up and crosses it towards Archer in the middle. It goes over him to Scienza at the back post who lashes it across, and Archer from 6 yards and entirely unmarked, just has to get something on it and keep it down but he can only do the first bit of that and with an open goal, launches it into the night sky. Fuck me.

Nine minutes gone and the ball is bobbling around in midfield and Jander takes a wild swing at a ball and shanks it backwards straight to a Leicester player. Leicester build up through midfield and get to the edge of the box with us not getting anywhere close before the ball is laid back to Manchester City loanee Mukasa, who has a pop from the edge of the box and it flies through Captain Jack’s legs and though Peretz gets a half decent hand to it, it’s got enough power to nestle in the corner. Fucks sake. So much for hitting them early.

Leicester’s tails are up and they are winning every challenge and picking up every second ball and putting us under immense pressure every time we have it. Our default setting of course in that scenario it’s too pass the ball backwards and that’s what Tom Fellows does, but he’s trying to hit it all the way to the goalkeeper and it doesn’t even get halfway there as he picks out Patson Daka, who gets there before the stranded Peretz, skips around him brings the ball in and even a striker is shit as Daka is able to drill it past the covering Welington and into the net. 2-0, 13 minutes. What is it about playing at the blue version of St Mary’s?

After the shock of going 2-0 down, we do have a few minutes where we actually look vaguely competent and win a free kick about 35 yards out, when Archer gets carted over after he had given the ball away. It’s too far out to shoot, so Wellington shapes it towards the back post and THB rises and thumps ahead of down into the turf and Begovic gets his walking frame out of the way and gets down well to push it away from the bottom corner.

It’s a brief respite though, as on the half hour mark it gets even fucking worse as Jander gives the ball away again and the ball gets switched to Fatawu, who lines up Welington, and Welington backs off too far and instead of having to try and pick out a team mate in the middle, Fatawu just lashes it into the near top corner before Peretz has any chance to move. Fucking hell, this is dreadful. 3-0 down and of course all the fucking “we want nine, we want nine” chants start. Can’t blame them I guess..

Tonda really should be making some changes right now, mainly to stop Caspar Jander doing anything more damaging, but he sits on his hands. Caspar then stretches into a tackle and that’s not great but he gets away with a yellow card that would almost certainly have been a red in the Premier League. Get him off for fuck‘s sake . No, all alright then. Casper then takes a swing at a free kick at the near post and plays an air shot which hits Cameron Archer and goes about a foot wide of our own post. Luckily, Archer’s aversion to getting one on target extends to our goal as well. What the fuck is going on here?

Even the referee is getting in the mood now as Archer attempts to run through a couple of players and gets given offside for no fucking reason at all. From the restart, Flynn Downes snaps into a tackle and wins the ball, but that’s a free kick to Leicester as well. We’re shit enough as it is, without you helping mate.

There are four minutes of injury time to be played, what with all the goals we’ve conceded and the celebrations and all that. We do get a semblance of control in those four minutes and we pass the ball around without putting it in the box and eventually the whistle blows when James Bree has it on the halfway line. Fucking hell.

Half time and big piles of dogshit. Completely outfought, outrun and outplayed by a team that wants to do the hard yards to win a game, as opposed to us, with several players who look like they don’t want to be there. There has to be at least two substitutions at half-time but Tonda goes one better than that and it’s three with our three most pathetic on the night players – Archer, Jander and Fellows all being replaced with Stewart, Charles and Matsuki.

The fears that we are going to get absolutely annihilated dissipate pretty quickly into the second half as the substitutes make an immediate difference, as you would expect after you have taken off three players who have been completely atrocious. Leicester are in a position that we found ourselves in a few times earlier on the season when we were well ahead at half-time and then had to manage the second half, and they look like they are settling for what they have.

We reached the hour mark, in control, if that’s possible at 3-0 down, but then the first chink of light in a wretched game so far as Scienza picks the ball up on the left, switches back onto his right foot and puts a cross towards the 6 yard box and Ross Stewart, with some exceptional movement away from Nelson, gets in front of Okoli and deftly flicks the ball past Begovic who puts a hip out. 3-1 and half an hour to ago. If we get another one before the 80 minute mark, I reckon Leicester’s arsehole will go completely.

Saints are back onto the attack straight away with Azaz skipping past a couple of defenders on the edge of the box, but he’s stretching for the shot and it’s easily pouched by Begović, despite the fact that he’s got rickets.

Before we could all dream of getting back into it, we have another defensive fuck up to negotiate, as THB doesn’t deal with a long ball and heads up in the air and when Stephens tries to tidy it up, he fucks it up as well and Daka gets in for the bouncing ball in front of Peretz and tries to lob it over him, but then everyone realises that Daka is in fact shit and there’s nothing to worry about as the ball drops wide.

Andy King is the caretaker PE teacher for Leicester and he signals his intentions by taking off Mukasa and Mavididi, two of his best attacking players and brings on a youngster to play in midfield and Jamal Lascelles as a third central defender. Not doing any attacking then lads?

Another ten minutes go by and the momentum of the goal has somewhat dissipated. Tonda again appears to be taking too long to throw substitutes on but eventually he does with Ryan Manning coming on in a straight swap for Welington. There is no doubt that Manning is a better attacking left back than Welington and that’s what we need right now. A few minutes later it’s the other fullback who is replaced, with Bree coming off to be replaced by Canada Cyle.

Matsuki has been lively since he came and ends himself chasing a bit of a lost cause over towards the right hand corner flag, but all well in good when Luke Thomas has a brain fart and needlessly pushes him over. In it comes from Scienza, Larin’s cross is too deep and over the back but stays in play and Manning slings it back into the mixer and it’s flicked on by defender. Big Cyle falls over, gets up, finds Shea, on to Leo, and his ball into the box is missed by everyone but Ryan Manning is alive to it at the back post and heads it back into the mixer where Begovic defies his arthritis to get out to flap the ball away from THB but all he’s done is knock it down for Captain Jack, who absolutely lashes it into the near top corner. What a fucking finished that is. 3-2 and nine minutes of normal time to go. The collective Leicester arsehole is twitching away like mad right now.

Andy King’s arsehole has certainly gone as he takes off his remaining two attackers in Fatawu and Daka and replaces them with another youngster in midfield and Jordan Ayew, who is old and shit.

Thomas, the Leicester left back is playing like an absolute fucking drain now and fouls Matsuki yet again when he was going absolutely nowhere. Scienza’s cross into the mixer is headed away but he picks up the ball again and plays a 1-2 with Matsuki and then pulls the ball back from the line and it’s gone to Captain Jack in the middle who waves a foot at it and sends it a couple of feet wide of the far post. Fuck off. That was the chance and will we get another one?

Yes we will as in comes another ball from Matsuki, and big Cyle goes up for it’s knocked away for another corner. Scienza hits it, Stewart Ross flicks at it and there is Ryan Manning, completely unmarked on the 6 yard line, in the middle of the posts and he just stands there and heads into the middle of the goal whilst Begovic tries to work out how to use the stairlift. 3-3 and the board goes up with a further six minutes on it.

Come on you fuckers. There’s only one team looking like they’re likely to win it now, with Charles crossing again and Azaz gets a swinging boot to it, but Begovic rolls off of his orthopaedic bed to make a save.

96 and THB‘s ball up the right finds Charles who shoves a powderpuff challenge from Nelson out of the way and knocks the ball into Stewart who plays it straight back to him and Shea curls it with his left foot around the nearest defender and inside the far post to leave Begovic scrambling around in the goal in a puddle of piss where his adult nappy his leaked. All the Saints fans are in that corner and it goes mental, huge celebration in front of them including the goalkeeper running 80 yards to get involved. It’s beautiful all the dickheads who were chanting about scoring nine 45 minutes ago are now chanting “You’re not fit to wear the shirt” as they leave the ground., It’s absolutely beautiful.

We have time to kick off and Leicester smash the ball forward with more hope than expectation. THB, as he has done for the entirety of the second half thumps a header away, back it comes, cleared by Azaz and big Cyle brings it down on his chest and the final whistle goes. Fucking ridiculous.

Oh my word. What a fucking ridiculous result after a first half that is right up there with other legendarily bad first halves that we’ve had, like Leicester at home when we got beat 9-0, Brentford at home under Juric and Spurs at home under Russell Martin. So bad, so off the pace, barely stringing two passes together and being completely outplayed, outrun and outfought for the entire 45 minutes. Second half however, after an opening fifteen where we looked better because we simply couldn’t look any worse, a goal from Ross Stewart and Leicester’s arsehole completely and utterly went. Once Stewart got the first, it was just a case of whether we’d get a second before running out of time and when that went in from Captain Jack with 10 minutes of normal time to go, we were always likely to get a point but getting the winner is above and beyond.

Just look at the goals, that’s a great cross from Scienza and a brilliant run and finish by Stewart for the first goal. It’s an amazing finish by Stephens for the second goal, lashing it into the roof of the net and no one has Ryan Manning down on their bingo card to score a header completely unmarked from 6 yards out. Then you get to Shea Charles beating the defender, playing a 1-2 with Ross Stewart and curling it with his wrong foot around the ex-Skate bastard goalkeeper and inside the far post. Absolute fucking delirium.

Tonda Eckert should do the lottery and collect all the ‘Get our of Jail’ cards from any Monopoly sets he can lay his hands on because he is the luckiest, jammiest bastard alive. The decision to play Archer from the start was horrific and it was proven horrific after 30 seconds. If he scores the open goal from 6 yards then the game is completely different and judging by Leicester’s response to adversity, we probably canter it. He had to make the changes at half-time and the difference in the second half with having a proper centre forward on the pitch in Ross Stewart, was probably the main reason why we won the game. He scored one and had a hand in two others, linked the play and ran the channels. Tonda tried to be too clever again and this time he just about got away with it.

To be fair to Tonda, he got the substitutions right at half-time though he should have made two before that, straight after Leicester went three up. Caspar Jander was absolutely shocking from the first minute, was lucky not to get sent off and should’ve been substituted after about 25 minutes. Instructions should’ve been gone out to him to pretend to be injured to save face and then come off. It is unbelievable quite how bad he was. Not far behind was Tom Fellows, who of course gave away the second Leicester goal and didn’t do a single thing in an attacking sense all of the first half and then you had Archer. Never can a triple substitution at half-time been so merited. To be honest there’s not a player out there who could’ve complained too much if they’ve got taken off. Finn Azaz was dreadful in that first half as he tends to be if the other team are up for it and closing him down all the time. Welington, after being brilliant on Saturday had a bit of a falling to earth against the admittedly tricky Fatawu, and Bree didn’t lay a glove on Mavididi

Matsuki when he came on and added massive energy as usual and I think it’s underrated how much quality he actually has. Stewart, as said, made a huge difference and Shea Charles, though he can be a little bit loose with his passing, brought energy and drive and power to the team and that winning goal will go down in legend. Surely he starts the next league game. Ryan Manning came on for Welington with about fifteen to go and he of course popped up with another goal and big Canadian Cyle with a C, got involved and ruffled a few feathers and caused a problem that the Leicester players didn’t really want to deal with.

One of the reasons we won of course is that Andy King totally shat the bed and Leicester‘s collective arsehole completely went, taking off attacking players for defenders and just trying to see it out when they hadn’t won tackle for the whole of the second half. As we’ve said plenty of times before about ourselves – if you have no attacking threat then the other team can just pile forward at will and not be remotely worried about keeping the back door shut or anything like that. They just invited more pressure that they were not equipped to deal with. Players that played well in the first half totally shrank and disappeared in the second half and the fans who were giving it the big one, with all the “we want nine” all the way through the first half, didn’t make a single fucking sound in the second half. Maybe get some humility.

Bad though we were, Leicester were really good in the first half, snapping into every tackle, being first to every loose ball and generally running us ragged in a real men against boys 45 minutes. Mavididi and Fatawu were unplayable as they always seem to be against us and even Patson Daka scored. In the second half of course, it completely changed round and all those Leicester players, like Winks and Skipp, who had been really up for it in the first half, totally fucked off once the first goal went in.

What makes it even more glorious that it’s against them. Bunch of wankers. Who can forget the 9-0 aftermath when they produced a DVD of it and played it on the big screen before we played them in the return game at the King Power, which we also won, coincidentally. Maybe consign that result to the memory banks lads and focus on the here and now you fucking bottle jobs.

Suddenly the League table is looking quite decent and we’re only one point off the playoffs, on a run of four wins out of five. We take a break from the League now to play Leicester again. I assume our team will be completely different because the FA Cup has suddenly become much less important than it was when we were not challenging to do anything this season. I can’t see many Leicester fans making the trip down and I’m sure some that have already bought tickets, will not be making the effort. You can sit at home and watch your 9-0 DVDs, you bunch of bellends.

This result and the manner of it should be huge for us. The boys now know that they can win a game from anywhere and the boost in confidence should be huge. After the FA Cup it’s Nathan Jones and Charlton at home and time to go again.

Up the Fucking Saints